University of Three

I hope that I’ll be a mother who is able to give her child the same things my parents gave to me - never doubting that I was the center of their world, that I had a real sanctuary around the dinner table every night in our own little university of three. 

And I want to be a parent who works to improve that world around me. 

I was raised to believe that if you can do something, you should do something. 

- Chelsea Clinton - 

Evolution is Everything

Congrats to Rihanna on her Vanguard award at this year's VMA's! Girlfriend has killer fashion and confidence. She totally inspires me to #workworkworkworkwork.

As she said in a recent Elle magazine article -- 

"As far as I could remember, fashion has always been my defense mechanism. Even as a child, I remember thinking, She could beat me, but she can NOT beat my outfit. And to this day, I think about it. I can compensate for all my weakness with my fashion. 

Fashion is my way to say who I am - and to be very loud about it at times. 

My desire for control is born from my need to be constantly changing. If I'm not doing something new, I'm not interested in doing it all. Evolution is everything."

Parenting Triumph

Our mothers are human, not the cookie-cutter ideal. Our moms make missteps. What’s important is how much they loved us. 

I’ll always remember these platitudes my mother said to me, like “Your job is your life insurance. Don’t ever let anybody take it away from you.” 

The other day Ava said, “Well, Mom, you said that drinking water with lemon is good for my body.” I burst into tears, going. “Oh my God, you listen to me!” Parenting triumph.

I was 23, when I had my first child. I didn’t know what I was doing. I was young. It was shocking. When people ask, “When’s the best time to get pregnant?” I say, “Pick the best day for when your entire life is gonna change.” There’s no good time to have your world turned upside down. 

As Ava becomes a woman, I'm proud that I taught her to not be ashamed about any of her experiences. Live life fully, with curiosity and love, and be brave.

Don't regret anything. Everything that happens in your life - the good, the bad - is meant to happen. [Reese Witherspoon, Glamour]

Don't Miss

Don't miss the little things. 

Don't miss the sunsets or the rain. 

Don't miss looking into the eyes of 

your dog or special friend or family member 

knowing how amazing you are to them. 

Don't miss the smell of coffee or tea or the chance to smile at a stranger 

because you may make his or her day.

- Kari Schenk, yoga instructor - 

Joyous Listener

I'm a fan of the musical composers Ira & George Gershwin. Their music was so ahead of their time and has left such a legacy!

In doing some research on them, I found this lovely fact --

Ira was a joyous listener to the sounds of the modern world.

"He had a sharp eye and ear for the minutiae of living."

He noted in a diary: "Heard in a day: An elevator's purr, telephone's ring, telephone's buzz, a baby's moans, a shout of delight, a screech from a 'flat wheel,' hoarse honks, a hoarse voice, a tinkle, a match scratch on sandpaper, a deep resounding boom of dynamiting in the impending subway, iron hooks on the gutter."

James Corden

Dear American Women… 

• Trust that money won’t make you happy. It will just pay for the search. 
• Get your heart broken; you’ll be better for it. Trust me on this. My heart wasn’t ready to truly love someone until it had been broken. If you’re in a place of heartache, remember that when you lay your head down tonight, somewhere else a person you may have never met is doing the same. And that person is going to love you more than the last one ever did. So look after your broken heart tonight; tomorrow could be the day it starts to mend. 
• Marry someone who makes you laugh. One day you’ll be old and tired; laughter will be the thing that gets you through. 
• Have kids if you want to. It turns the world into a different place and makes you aware of so many things. There’s nothing greater you can do for the world than create someone who can change it. 
• Take action, however big or small. There are awful things happening in the world, but just because they’re not happening on your street doesn’t mean they’re not happening. Try not to forget that. Do what you can. Your voice is loud and strong if you speak up. 
• And VOTE! I know that so often it an feel pointless, as if you’re voting for the best of the bad bunch, but imagine if you’re allowed to have a voice. You’d be outraged and would stand up for that power. Your vote is important. Use it. 
• Live in this moment. Everything in your past is gone and everything in your future is undecided. All you really have is this moment, right now. So be the very best you can be. Let yourself shine. If you always do that, your life is going to be great. I promise. 

By James Corden, Glamour & 2016 Tony Awards host 

K-Day: Year 8

I will never forget you

You'll always be by my side

From the day that I met you

I knew that I would love you 'til the day I die

["I Will Never Forget You" by Zara Larsson & MNEK]

K-Day June 8, 2008... Thinking of you today, Kyle B. Simonson! 

Our story and my eulogy: www.mywedding.com/chelseakyle

Nicki Minaj

Do marry your job, at least temporarily. 

It’s important that at some point in your life you really focus on your career, almost to the point of insanity. 

You’ll never get this time back. 

You have to want it so bad that you wake up in the morning and you think about it, live it, breathe it, eat it, and see it all day. 

After you’ve accomplished a couple of things, THEN take a moment. 

Work and work for those first years, and them come out of the matrix a little bit and take a freaking vacation. 

[Quote: Glamour / Photos: Robert Cavalli] 

What the Selfie Hath Wrought

Written by Alexandra Fiber and Danielle Gibson 

1. The Wealfie: a selfie to flaunt your income. Now we know what the inside of a $16 million private jet looks like. 
2. The Nobelfie: taken while doing good deeds, like volunteer work or hanging out with your little brother. 
3. The Shelfie: typically a Diptyque candle, a colorful array of books, a bouquet of white roses, and a Paris is Always a Good Idea print. 
4. The Giselefie: allies only to Gisele; mere mortals need not attempt. 
5. The Sellfie: sponsored by a brand (we know you’re making money off this ‘gram!). 
6. The Intellfie: selfie with glasses - you know, to make ya look smart. 
7. Le Tour Eiffelfie: WE GET IT, YOU’RE IN PARIS. 

Stages of Stuff

I believe our lives have 4 distinct stages: childhood, youth, middle age, and old age. 

In shopping terms, that’s desired, acquired, enjoyed, and redeployed. 

1. Childhood is the first and shortest stage, when our tastes are developed, often by watching Saturday morning commercials. This is where we dream about the stuff we desire. 
2. In the second stage, we actually start buying stuff. Garage sales are where many of us first feel the thrill of the hunt. This also is the phase when we hear ourselves saying things such as, “Honey, wouldn’t this driftwood clock look perfect over the mantel?” and where we learn that what delights us might not delight others. … During that stage, I saw every garage sale as a shopportunity. But I only bought stuff that passed my I-didn’t-buy-it-and-now-I’m-kicking-myself test. (A friend still regrets walking away from a classic Shroud of Turin beach towel. He’d now be its proud owner if he’d asked himself my question: “Will I be sorry later if I don’t buy this?”) I’m frequently satisfied to simply hold an object, and after 10 minutes in my possession - 10 minutes of owning it - I’ll put it back. 
3. The third stage, middle age, begins after your treasures are brought home and profoundly displayed. Over time you grow less and less pleased, until the day you hear yourself say, “I’m so tired of that old thing I could scream.” At this point you remove the treasure and store it out of sight.
4. By the time we reach old age, our once adored objects are just in the way. That’s when we take an honest look at our stuff and see it for what it really is: garage-sale fodder. The redeployment period signifies a rebirth and begins the cycle again. 

The Four Stages of Stuff by Pam Tallman (Orange Coast, November 2015) 

For You

[The song I sang at Scott and Vivianne (Park) Muckey's wedding] 

“For You” by Kenny Lattimore

For you I'd give a lifetime of stability
Anything you want of me
Nothing is impossible
For you there are no words or ways to show my love
Or all the thoughts I'm thinking of
Cause this life is no good alone
Since we've become one
I've made a change
Everything I do now makes sense
All roads end
All I do is for you

For you I share the cup of love that overflows
And anyone who knows us knows
I would change all faults I have
For you there is no low or high or in between
Of my heart that you haven't seen
Cause I share all I have and am
Nothing I've said's hard to understand
All I feel I feel deeper still
And always will
All this love is for you

Every note that I play
Every word I might say
Every melody I feel
Are only for you and your appeal

Every page that I write
Every day of my life
Would not be filled without the things
That my love for you now brings

For you I make the promise of fidelity
Now and for eternity
No one could replace this vow
For you I'd take your hand and heart
And everything
And add to them a wedding ring

Cause this life is no good alone
Since we've become one you're all I've known
And if this feeling should leave I'd die
And here's why
All I am is for you

Everything I do now makes sense
All roads end
All I do
Is for you
Only for you

KatriJ Toast

[March 20, 2016 - My Mrs. of Honor toast at TJ and Katrina (Jensen) Ellis' wedding]

Good morning! My name is Chelsea Galusky, and I have known Katrina for the past 11yrs. I am honored to have been her roommate, Wing Woman, and friend ever since.

A special thanks to The Vintage Rose for hosting this beautiful wedding. Even before Katrina and TJ were engaged, I sent Katrina this venue lead because it matches Katrina’s “vintage and fabulous” style perfectly. Thankfully, sampling their delicious food helped win TJ over in the wedding planning process. Who doesn’t love brunch? It’s absolutely delicious!

We are also grateful to Karen, Timothy, and Janelle -- the parents of this beautiful couple -- for creating and raising brilliant children. Katrina and TJ, you both look stunning.

Welcome to all you wedding guests who traveled to be in Orange County this weekend too! I hope you’re able to see the sites from Arrested Development, Laguna Beach, and The OC while you’re here.

Katrina and I met through my Uncle George, Auntie Donna, and cousins Jessica and Sarah, who live in Hawaii. My family moved from Hawaii to South Carolina, so I remember feeling like we got replaced when I saw 3 white blond girls in their family photos. 

Fast-forward a few years: Katrina and I were able to get to know each other more when she transferred to Vanguard University in Costa Mesa, California. Even after we both graduated, we still like to go to Theater shows, Music concerts, and volunteer at our alma mater.

Roommate Days: As Katrina’s roommate, I realized that Katrina could sing about ANYthing. She made up songs about whatever she was doing and practiced her various accents to narrate her daily adventures. We’ve chested MANY parties together, especially if there is a Murder Mystery, Clothes Swap, or Luau theme. We even spent weekends watching whole seasons of LOST, and this was before binge-watching was a thing! In our single days, we were each other’s +1 to friend’s weddings. Katrina is a great Wing Woman. I learned quickly that if you give her a Coke, she’ll stay awake past 9pm.

Travel: Our shared love of music came in handy on the many road trips we made together. I prefer to keep my driving limit to anything within 4hrs of Orange County, while Katrina has done several cross-country trips through her job that sent her to so many Small Town, USA cities. I’m still amazed by the Winter Wardrobe she accumulated and Snow Days that she survived. My favorite place she lived was Charlotte, NC because she made memories with my family and friends – like Julie & Brandon – there. When my husband Robert and I conspired to plan our surprise wedding in Charlotte (after a 6 week engagement), Katrina was my Maid of Honor.

About TJ: – When Katrina moved back to California and started dating again, our crew (Ryan & Caitlin – Katherine - Chelbert - Scottianne) had a blast hearing stories of her suitors. Robert finally gave Katrina a challenge: Date someone who is Athletic, sarcastic, and has regular dude interests. She took a chance on TJ, and we are witnessing that success. Robert and I love sitting together in church, being in the same Life Group, and sharing LOTS of inside jokes with you.

KatriJ, you complement each other well. TJ, thank you for treating Katrina well. To paraphrase Beyoncé:

“I don’t know much about Algebra, but I know one plus one equals two.

And it’s Katrina and TJ, that’s all you have when the world is through.”

Let’s raise a glass to toast the newest members of the Newlywed Club - Mr. & Mrs. Ellis!

Personality & Professionalism

What do I look for when I hire people for elizabethbanks.com? Personality!

Life is too short to deal with bad chemistry. 

I also want someone to take responsibility when things go wrong. I find that to be a true test of people. 

Bad situations are learning experiences, and nothing upsets me more than blame being thrown around. 

I would just prefer it if you say, “It happened. I’m sorry, and let’s move on.”

I love professionalism — in a housekeeper, in a janitor, in a waiter, in a barista. And I’ve done a lot of those jobs!

[Elizabeth Banks] 

Nice Guys

How to Find a Good Guy 

by Jason Kennedy 

"They’re out there. Here’s my advice… 

1. Do your research. What’s on his Instagram? Is he hammered? With Hooters waitresses 90% of the time? Move on. 
2. Notice the details. Look at how he treats your server, the valet. Does he have a wandering eye? Chances are he’s doing it when you’re not around too. 
3. Allow him to BE good. Some girls are turned off when guys are nice. Since when did treating you with respect become a bad thing? 
4. Know who you are. Maybe you don’t want a good boy. No judgement. But guys can spot it when women aren’t themselves. Confidence will get you what you DO want." 

You can’t meet someone until you’ve become who you’re becoming. 
- Nora Ephron, writer and filmmaker - 

T-Swift Squad

"As the first woman to win Album of the Year at the Grammys twice, I want to say to all the young women out there: 

There are going to be people along the way who will try to undercut your success or take credit for your accomplishments or your fame. 

But if you just focus on the work and don't let those people sidetrack you, someday when you get where you're going... 

You'll look around and you'll know that it was YOU and the people who love you who put you there. 

And that will be the greatest feeling in the world." 

Taylor Swift at the 2016 Grammys

Keeping It All Together

Sheryl Sandberg is the author of Lean In and of Chief Operating Officer of Facebook. Here are her top tricks for keeping it all together:

• What time do you go to bed and wake up? I sleep from 10:30 or 11pm until 5:30 or 6am. I try to get seven hours of sleep every night. 

• Give us your top life-organizing strategy. I always have a notebook. I’m such a geek. People think I’m crazy - I’m the only one at Facebook with a notebook! 
• How do you control email overload? My motto is ‘Done is better than perfect.’ I try to do it quickly. I think people really appreciate fast answers. 
• Best everyday work advice? Have someone who praises you publicly. It’s hard for women to praise themselves, but I can say, “What Andrea did is amazing!” 
• What are your rules for making your home life sane? We don’t have phones at meals. And my husband and I try not to travel at the same time. 

[Article in Glamour, photo from Vogue]

Charming Career Advice

Charm is one of the most underutilized weapons in business. Because people are drawn to it. And it’s free! 

Charm makes people want to do business with you. Women have to be smart and hardworking to get ahead. But a dose of charisma always helps; people like happy people. 

I read a memoir by Howard Schultz [CEO of Starbucks], and he only ever hired happy people. There’s enough drama in the world without coming to work and being a burden on everybody. 

In sales, we have a saying: “Teeth make smiles, and smiles make sales.” 

I genuinely believe that happy people sell more, and work harder, because they love what they do. I have so much fun!

If you’re trying to achieve perfection, the reality is that perfection doesn’t exist. So we each need to find our own recipe for success. 

Organization is key - I am a great believer in lists. 

Life runs more smoothly with the five p’s - Proper Preparation Prevents Poor Performance. 

Be Bold, BB, is another one. Bold is better than being ignored. 

- Marigay McKee, new president of Saks Fifth Avenue -