Gloria Vanderbilt

People may know Gloria Vanderbilt -- designer, artist, writer, my mom -- for starting the designer jeans craze and building a fashion empire, but that is really only one chapter in her extraordinary life.

She was born into a world that no longer exists, and has been in the public eye, for better or worse [Vanderbilt was a railroad heiress and the subject of a lengthy custody trial], ever since. She is a survivor but proof to all women that you don't have to harden your heart in order to overcome adversity.

She has lived and loved and lost a lot,
has had her heart broken,
her trust betrayed,
but she's never lost her optimism nor her independence.

At 90 she is still painting, still writing, still reimagining and reinventing herself.

She is proof that true beauty only deepens with age.

Anderson Cooper, journalist

Intro to Miss America

Miss America is still my favorite pageant. This was the only reason my sisters and I were able to stay up late to watch it when it aired. We selected our favorites at the very beginning to see who would make it to the end. Every year, I host viewing parties where my girlfriends and I do the same! This method helps make watching The Bachelor/Bachelorette more exciting too. 

It's the longest running pageant after all, and the feminist in me adores how much they emphasize that this is a scholarship program versus a beauty contest. (insert one of those hilarious Miss Congeniality movie quotes) 

My favorite part now - Each contestant gets a few seconds of TV time to introduce something clever about their states and say their names. 

Here are some good ones from the recent Miss America 2015: 

"My state has 4 distinct seasons - Football, hurricanes, Mardi Gras, and crawfish. I'm Lacey Sanchez, Miss Lousiana!"

"From the birthplace of Carrie Underwood, Kristen Chenoweth, and Chuck Norris.. Yes, Chuck Norris.. I'm Alex Eppler, Miss Oklahoma!"

"From the state where it's either misty, sprinkling, drizzling, raining, pouring down, or better grab an umbrella -- I'm Rebecca Anderson, Miss Oregon!"

Chris Rock parody

Yes, Social Media Specialist is my job. No, that doesn't mean I can't unplug from my personal accounts. But it does make me appreciate the great writers out there who use Social Media as an outlet!

There are some accounts - like this @ozChrisRock parody - that have me laughing (and wishing) I could write the same posts personally and professionally.

Here are some highlights -

• You should be required to read a book for every 10 selfies you take. 

• I wished I loved anything as much as white people love saying "gracias" at Mexican restaurants. 

• Sir. Your burrito is $4.97. With guacamole, your total comes to $286,932.79 

• Don't worry if someone doesn't text you back. Most people only check their phones every 5 seconds all day long. 

• Instead of going to Starbucks, I like to make my own coffee, yell my name out incorrectly, and then light a $5 bill on fire. 

• If a woman watches a movie alone, who answers all of her questions? 

• Sorry I didn't recognize you. I've only seen you on Instagram so I was looking for the person wearing 3 filters and an inspirational quote. 

• Selfie - (ˈselfē) noun: a picture taken of yourself to show strangers on the internet that you have no friends to take pictures of you 

• You only live once, so don't forget to spend 15 hours every day on the internet, desperately searching for the validation of strangers. 

• Before you get married ask yourself: is this the person you want to watch stare at their phone the rest of your life? 

• Sometimes I wonder if all of America isn't just a reality show being produced for the entertainment of the rest of the world. 

• Mistakes married men make: Doing things. Not doing things. Thinking about doing things. Not thinking about doing things.

And my favorite one, that I also have framed in my office:

**BREAKING NEWS**

Facebook is down. Twitter is down. Instagram is down.

Worker productivity rises.

U.S. climbs out of recession.